First encounters

February 8, 2008


Twice today I heard a friend dismiss someone because of something they said when they first met. In the first case it was an obnoxious bordering on hostile comment, and in the second case it was something someone said in their interview. And in both cases, they never updated their opinions of the person, and probably more accurately, has born a grudge ever since.

I forget sometimes that I’m probably always making an impression on someone, and most of the time I don’t think about it. But I guess I should.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Brad Wood February 9, 2008 at 1:48 am

That reminds me of the bit I heard where Andrew Lloyd Webber was talking to the late Alan Jay Lerner, and asks him “Alan, why do you suppose people take such an instant dislike to me?” to which Lerner replies, “Well, it does save time.”

It’s understandable that some find vows of silence appealing, given the astonishing consequences of our utterances. I have pretty decent long- and short-term memory, especially since renouncing certain inhalation regimens years ago, and as well am perhaps a bit more attentive, and accurate in assessing impact. It’s a good thing—I still have folks recalling with certainty things I’d thrown off in conversation that I cannot imagine ever saying, even in jest.

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