Roger Bourland
writes about music and life

Our plumber of the last 5 years has been Izi, and his company is called Izi does it. I have no idea what his name is in reality, Isadore I presume, but who knows. He is a short Brooklyn Jew, pudgy, is a heavy smoker, is very funny, has movie star glasses (more like goggles), and the top of his crack always shows when he bends over to adjust something under the toilet.

Today he fixed two running toilets and a drippy faucet. When he finished he insisted that I flush each one. As I did, I cooed at his success. The second one, he got down on his knees and listened to the sound inside the toilet. “Listen. listen!” he said. “Shh! See, you can’t hear it any more AND the toilet fills faster.” Wow. It was a real zen moment.

Izi always calls us on Christmas Eve to wish us a Merry Christmas. He loves to go to Las Vegas and gamble. He has 228 shot glasses in his shot glass collection. “I had a bigger one before, but one of my former psycho roommates broke ‘em all.” He appreciated my out-of-control martini glass collection as his was even more out of control.
As he left I asked whether he had a website: “No, I don’t even have internet. I used to but got addicted to playing games online all night long.” He smiles and waves in the sunlight, his orange T-shirt with bright blue letters that say IZI DOES IT glows in the bright western sky.