Roger Bourland
writes about music and life

Be careful for what you wish for.

We are told this and learn this many times if we are lucky. Along with religious freedom comes a variety of other freedoms. Richard Snyder became a minister online of the Universal Life Church and it was he who married us a few weeks ago. I took the bait and applied for ordination as well and am now a minister of the same church. As I look down the list of things I am now legally able to do I am amazed by my new status. I can baptize, marry, hold funerals, I have visitation rights in hospitals and hospices, and all the other authorities that people like my father (who is a REAL minister who went to school to become the great preacher/minister that he is) have. Now here’s the kicker: I can start my own religion. There is a whole section online on how to do it.

In line with starting one’s own religion, one must find appropriate titles for one’s self and whoever else you decide to have be part of your religion. I’m struggling with choosing my title. “The Most Esteemed” jumps out at me and cuts right to the point. But then there is the traditional “Reverend” and “Most Reverend” that doesn’t draw too much attention to itself. And then I could be Swami, or Brother, or His Holiness. “Pope” and “Cardinal” just seem wrong so I’ll cross them off right away. Here are the accepted titles available to date:

Abbe, Reverend of Rock ‘n Roll, Abbess, Abbot, Ananda, Angel, Apostle of Humility, Apostolic Scribe, Arch Deacon, Arch Priest, Archbishop, Arch cardinal, Ascetic Gnostic, Bible Historian, Bishop, Brahman, Brother, Canon, Cantor, Cardinal, Channel, Chaplain, Colonel, Cure, Deacon, Dervish, Directress, Disciple, Druid, Elder, Faith Healer, Evangelist, Emissary, Father, Field Missionary, Flying Missionary, Free Thinker, Friar, Goddess, Guru, Hadji, Healing Minister, High Priest, High Priestess, Imam, Lama, Lay Sister, Magus, Martyr, Messenger, Metropolitan, Minister of Music, Minister of Peace, Missionary, Missionary Doctor, Missionary Healer, Missionary of Music, Missionary Priest, Monk, Monsignor, Most Reverend, Mystical Philosopher, Orthodox Monk, Parochial Educator, Pastor General, Patriarch, Peace Counselor, Preacher, Preceptor, Priest, Priestess, Prophet, Rector, Rabbi, Religious Preacher, Revelator, Reverend, Reverend Father, Reverend Mother, Right Reverend, Saintly Healer, Scribe, Seer, Shaman, Soul Therapist, Sister, Spiritual Counselor, Spiritual Warrior, Starets, Swami, Teller, Thanatologist, The Very Esteemed, Universal Rabbi, Universal Religious Philosopher, Vicar, Universal Philosopher of Absolute Reality, Wizard, Gothi, Gythia, Psychic Healer, Minister of Rock ‘n Roll, Rock ‘n Roll Missionary, Rock Doctor (R.D), Rock ‘n Roll Minister, Child of the Universe, Prince, Spiritual Healer, Saint, Pope

Don’t worry, I haven’t gone off the deep end. I’m not starting a religion. But I could. And you could too.

Be careful what you wish for.

Photo by Mark Davidson

The Metropolitan Opera

Rufus Wainwright has decided to “drop his plans” to compose an opera for the Met in 2014. Rufus had to compose the piece in French and Peter Gelb insisted on English. They parted on good terms. The New York Times wrote a piece on it a few days ago.

PRIMA DONNA will have its premiere next July at the Manchester International Festival in England. Rufus is orchestrating the score now.

Today we went to Universal Studios. We started with The Mummy Ride, then The Simpsons Ride, and then Jurassic Park. All were wonderful, but seemed short. “You mean that’s it?” I found myself saying. And everything had too much jabber before the ride with people standing around waiting for doors to open. We went to every ride except Curious George because we didn’t want to get wet again.

The place is like a smaller version of Disneyland. Everything is cut down, which is fine for me. The layout is wonderful.

The most annoying thing about the entire experience is the constant loud music and talking over the loudspeakers. I will bring earplugs next time. They don’t need to do this to keep us happy. We ate at the terrible restaurant next to Jurrasic Park and we hear violent crazy music the entire time while we were trying to eat. Someone needs to hire a sonic overseer of the park or fire the current one.

We wandered over to the Citywalk. Roger found a make up artist, and for $25 he got to be painted like his current superhero: The Joker (Heath Ledger). He looks fairly convincing, dont’ you think?

James Roger Bourland as The Joker

This weekend I have a special guest: James Roger Bourland, son of my brother, Andrew Bourland, and Susan Casey. I’m looking foward to pretending like I’m a tourist in LA and do everything I’ve always wanted to do but have been too busy to do. “Little” Roger will be 14 next week and now is almost as tall as I am. My family’s nickname for me as a boy was “Bo” and I’m still called that by them. So watch out LA: Uncle Bo and Little Roger are on the loose.

Yesterday we started our vacation dining at the LAX theme restaurant, ENCOUNTER, and had a lovely lunch there. Then we went to UCLA, toured the campus and got a UCLA jacket for Roger’s birthday. After a little drive through Beverly Hills we went home where I set him up with a Wii and he played with that for a couple of hours. Then last night we went to the CineramaDome to watch TROPIC THUNDER on an enormous screen. Today we will go to Universal Studios and spend the day. So i am tapping into my inner 13-year old and having a blast.

[PS: Happy birthday to my sister, Elizabeth!]

Yesterday in my duties as a chairman, I attended several meetings where we discussed and invented jobs for graduate students who in turn oversee other students whose duties we also defined. I couldn’t help but feel like a member of “the gods” who set cosmic parameters in motion and watch them play out.

At UCLA, each department has a self-review and an external review every eight years. This is a necessary prod to keep the educational process vital. One of the Chair’s primary responsibility is to continually update the curriculum. With any luck, whoever a group or society picks to set up a curriculum, one hopes that institutional memory, innovation, and adherence to the organization’s principles guides them to better and better ways of educating students.

Beyond imagining how a curriculum can shape a student’s world view, there is the curricular Yenta aspect of the admission process––meaning, when you put people together (in this case students) in a class, in a curriculum, in a particular year, these students all go through the program together, and there is a bond. And from time to time, they meet and fall in love and get married with each other. Two musicians in one household can prove to be too much music for some and a student may fall in love with someone who is completely different from them. And even if they don’t marry, they stay in touch with each other, hire each other, recommend students to each other, and through Facebook, many of them stay in touch in new ways by being members of a “Friends of [YOUR SCHOOL]”. I enjoy keeping track of our graduates through Facebook––to see their careers blossom, to become more themselves, to move to a new city, and sometimes start new careers.

My brother Andy was prescient in singing Facebook’s praises from their beginning. Now I see he was right on. The phenomenon that Facebook has set in motion, will likely be part of our society forever. I can now get in touch with some of my old friends from Green Bay, and Madison, and Boston, and New York, and, well, all over the world. Getting back in touch with old friends feels pretty good.

I found Janet Grice the other day, the woman for whom I wrote my solo bassoon composition for in 1978 (Soliloquy VIII: Meditation) through “Friends of NEC.” She remembered my piece as having microtones––a detail I have since forgotten.

Little celebrations like this make Facebook a worth while hobby.

Here is Celeste Holmes and Frank Sinatra singing “Who wants to be a millionaire” from HIGH SOCIETY by Cole Porter

On Sunday, two days after our Mill Valley marriage, Richard and Paul invited two dear friends for lunch. Tatyana and Serge are terrific people and the fact that they came bearing jamon iberico had me prejudiced in their favor from square one.

I have tried to get HOMER IN CYBERSPACE out of my head for months and only recently am I replacing it with other music. (There IS a FIREBIRD loop that goes on forever in my head like an alternate form of tinnitus.) Richard, always a great fan of my music, was unable to come to any performances of HOMER because his husband Paul wrecked his leg and couldn’t walk. So, in that Richard had just married us I figured I could sing for my supper and sing some excerpts form HOMER. I did so on Friday night after our marriage; I did in the car driving in Richard’s Black Prius; and for the Russian contingent on Sunday. It was great fun to revisit but my brain is infected again. Daniel played all the accompaniments on his iPhone and was able to hook it up to the house PA or the car sound system.

As I sang, I celebrated the response: Richard just smiled greatly the entire time; Daniel looked at me lovingly; Serge looked transfixed; and Paul and Tatyana let their hair down (and then some) and danced and mimed and sang along like teenagers. Schubert would have loved it. I love it when music can physically grab people like this.

Daniel and I were married last night in the home of Richard and Paul: Richard has a California license to marry people, and Paul was the witness. It was a deeply moving experience with all four of us in tears. I thought I would be the only one crying after the “I do” part but I was not alone. It feels wonderful and very real for two guys to be married. It’s taken our relationship to a whole new level.

This morning I woke up in R&P’s beautiful Mill Valley home, surrounded by Redwoods and decided to catch up on my blog reading, starting with one of my Dad’s blogs. I was amazed and downright thrilled to find this most touching post that he made a few days ago.

OUR SON’S GETTING MARRIED
Yep. He is. “So what’s so great about that?” you ask. Well, he’s marrying another man.

I realize that the right wing political and religious folks will tell us this is a very bad thing. Marriage is reserved for a man and a woman. It is an institution that must be “protected.” Somehow all that talk seems hollow when your own son is gay and announces that he and his partner of 15 years are planning to walk down the aisle. When 50% of heterosexual marriages fail in our generation, one wonders exactly who marriage needs protection from. To paraphrase Jesus, “Marriage was made for people, not people for marriage.” So it is with all institutions.

They are both good guys. Brilliant. Talented. Interesting. Successful. Fun. They have been open and honest about their sexual orientation and their relationship from the beginning. No lying, covering-up or sneaking around. Nor have they flaunted it. They seem to have more going for them than many of the couples I know.

I know more about marriage than a lot of people - having been happily married for over 58 years and having worked intensely with married couples over a long ministry. I think good people can deserve each other and should be free to accept the rights, the privileges and the burdens of marriage. It’s hard for me to imagine that their new relationship will do any of us harm. And it may just set an example for people to see that it’s what a couple has inside that makes for great marriages - not appearances or traditions.

Next year, a year from today, we will have a celebration ceremony for all of our friends, celebrating one year of marriage and 15 years of living together.

[Rice falls from the sky.]

Conference of the iGods; © Roger Bourland and Mel Shapiro

“Conference of the iGods” from HOMER IN CYBERSPACE
Music: Roger Bourland
Lyrics: Mel Shapiro
Chief: Nathan Langdon

—
Conference of the iGods (12:51)

Tina:
Stay as far
Under the radar
Of the i-gods,
My man

Don’t let them
Know you exist

They won’t hesitate
To control your
Fate

Don’t let them
Get your number

The i-gods are as strong
As titanium
And deadly as
Uranium

They’ll re-wire your head
Lead you around by the nose
Their favorite game
Is anything goes.

Don’t let them
Even know you’re alive

They’ve got a tele-conference going
Say,
This may be worth knowing

Tele-conference of the i-gods

Chief
(Taking roll)
01010101010101010?

Each one answers when asked
“Present” Read the rest of this entry »

Daniel and I are getting married this week.

This morning we went to the Beverly Hills Courthouse and got our marriage license. It was a funny trip. As I came out of the elevator, I glanced to the right and just like the DMV, there was a big sign pointing us to get in line for marriage licenses. So, I went right over as there was no one in line. Then Daniel yelled to me from across the room pointing out that I needed to go through the metal detector first. It was low pressure, so no one arrested me for making the mistake. As I walked over to the area, I walked past a group of people waiting for the elevator. “I wanna marry HIM” said a male voice in the group. I didn’t look assuming he wasn’t talking about me.

We stripped and got through the metal detector and went back to the license line. “NEXT” the voice shouted and I went up to the window. “Roger, it’s not your turn” Daniel calmly said to me. I was oblivious that someone was standing in front of me.

Was I nervous? A hopeless Sagittarian trying to reach his goal as fast as possible?

Finally we went to the window. A friendly black woman helped us with the signatures and made us swear that the information was correct. “And don’t sign until I tell you to” she said emphatically. Too late: I had already signed. She sighed: “Well, I’ll have to print out another copy.” She disappeared and Daniel continued to be patient and loving. After all, we were getting married soon. She returned and told us to wait for 30 minutes while she got the license ready.

Daniel had a business call to make so he disappeared outside. I sat alone on a big couch in the Beverly Hills Courthouse waiting for our license, checking my email on my iPhone.

“I’d like to marry YOU” a voice suddenly said in front of me. I looked up and saw a 50-something year old man in shorts and a T-shirt staring at me. He was not particularly handsome but looked like a friendly chap.

“You are my perfect type: 6 foot 2; graying, older than I am, blue eyes (I tried to interrupt) and handsome.” I blushed. “Your friend is not my type: too young. Look here”–– he showed me a well worn picture of a hunky young guy––your friend can have my ex and the WE can get married. Look, I’ve got $30,000 dollars.” He opened up his fanny pack and pulled out a wad of rubber-banded money to tempt me. This seemed very funny. Was he bribing me? Was this his dowery? I smiled at him: “I’m already taken, but you shouldn’t have too much trouble finding someone.” “Yes, but you are perfect. Won’t your friend let me marry you?” Seeing that Daniel had just hung up, I encouraged him to go ask him himself. Then Daniel appeared in the lobby and a voice came over the public address system: “Roger and Daniel, your marriage license is ready.” The man knew it wasn’t going to happen and walked away.

This weekend we’ll be having a small civil ceremony with a friend who has a license to marry people. If the California Proposition #8 is defeated in November, then we will have a ceremony/party next year to celebrate our fifteen years of being together and our first year as a married couple.

My wild love went ridin
She rode all the day
She wrote to the devil
And asked him to pay
The devil was wiser
Its time to repent
He asked her to give back
The money she spent
My wild love went ridin
She rode to the sea
She gathered together
Some shells for her head
She rode and she rode on
She rode for a while
Then stopped for an evenin
And lay her head down
She rode on to christmas
She rode to the farm
She rode to japan
And re-entered a town
By this time the weather
Had changed one degree
She asked for the people
To let her go free
My wild love is crazy
She screams like a bird
She moans like a cat
When she wants to be heard
My wild love went ridin
She rode for an hour
She stopped and she rested
And then she rode on
Ride, cmon

[From The Doors “Waiting for the Sun”]

“Shame” from FLASHPOINT/STONEWALL (1994)
Music: Roger Bourland
Lyrics: John Hall
Chorus: Gay Men’s Chorus of LA, Jon Bailey, director
Video: Kim Paulsen
Published by Yelton Rhodes Music/Los Angeles
Alex Theatre, Glendale CA: 1994

Shame

As a a boy I was hated and called names
for being something different.
I did not understand.
I recognized the difference but could not comprehend
what that difference was.
I felt shame.

Later, as a young man
with sprouting hair and spouting hormones
I understood the difference.
I understood the difference
but could not comprehend the hatred.
I felt shame.

Mighty and powerful institutions of this
planet professing peace and love for all
excluded me and my kind
for being different,
for being who we are.
This was beyond my comprehension.
I felt shame.

What they fear is only me,
a creature of small significance,
a true minority.
Yet with my brothers and sisters of difference,
I matter.

Now, as I ripen to maturity,
I have no use for shame
and will not wait for comprehension.
For love expressed is surely blest by deities
remembered and forgotten.

The echoes of those hated names
and fears for being different
now clarify my life;
and being who I am,
different from the most, feels worthy.
I feel strength,
I feel honor,
I feel love
and I feel no shame.

We have had to make some drastic cuts in our department related to the California budget crisis. The process is a painful one but necessary and interesting. To console myself, I think about patterns in nature, where when you cut off a branch, two grow back. Pruning is a pattern and is always good for the plant. The pruning is either done by natural causes, or by a wise gardener, or an administrator who has to make cuts to their budget.

Yesterday, four of us were wracking our brains over trying to find ways to cut. We spent 45 minutes and only cut $7000, then we found a forgotten expense that erased it. Then all of a sudden, bang, bang, bang, and we came up with excellent solutions that did the least amount of curricular damage. What I loved was the ‘bang bang’ part where all of a sudden, we all came up with the solution to our cuts in one minute.

[Image by less like math]